Joke of the week

So, this man - fresh back from the USA visits an entertainment agent and says
"I'm just back from a successful tour of the USA with Toby my talking dog - can you get me any bookings in the UK?"

"Hmmmm....." says the agent a touch cynically - "Let's see shall we"

The agent then looks a the dog and asks "What were the conditions like in the US?"

To which the dog, looking the agent straight in the eyes, replies "Ruff"

"Hmmmmm" says the agent, looks at the dog and asks "So, how was the flight back?"

Again, the dog looks the agent straight in the eyes and replies "Ruff"

The agent, becoming more sure of his position and seeing that the man has a copy of today's newspaper, looks at the dog and asks "What are the headlines in today's paper?"

The dog just sits and looks at the agent.

The agent asks the question again, this time in a slightly louder voice.

The dog does not move.

The agent transfers his gaze to the dog's owner who, looking very embarrassed, gets up and drags the reluctant dog from the office.

In the corridor, the man rolls the newspaper in to a tight tube and begins to beat the dog, interspersing the beating with his words

"WHY DID YOU NOT" "TELL THE MAN" "THE BLOODY HEADLINES IN THE BLOODY" "NEWSPAPER. YOU'VE RUINED" EVERY" "THING NOW"

Cowering, the dog sits and looks pitifully at the man for a few moments. Finally, he opens his mouth and says............





"I've lost count of the number of times that I have told you that I still can't read"